How to keep your bedroom child free

keeping kids out of the bedroom

Do you want privacy in the bedroom but find it impossible with young children? You're not alone. 41% of parents responding to our Get it on! Sex Lives Survey told us that they'd been interrupted by their kids during a passionate moment.

And how did parents react? Well, over a quarter (27.7%)told us they hid under the duvet...while just under 30% pretended to be playing a game! Only 17% used the opportunity to have a discussion about parents needing private time together. We asked parents to share their ideas of how to avoid the embarrassing moments and claim the bedroom back.

Be consistent with what you tell your children

It’s important to be consistent with the messages you give your children - if you encourage your children to get into bed with you sometimes, they won’t understand that at other times you want privacy. If you want your bedroom to be your own space then change morning cuddles in bed with cuddles on the sofa with blankets and cushions.

Children respond well to planned-out bedtime routines. At night if they keep getting out of bed and want to come into your bed - be firm. Gently but firmly put them back into bed without talking to them or turning the lights on. It may be a tough start but once they realise this is what happens at bedtime they will soon get used to it and you will have some of your evening left to do things you enjoy.

Mornings and light evenings can be confusing for young children, especially in the summer when it is light – as to them it doesn’t mean bedtime it means playtime. Black-out blinds will darken the room and may help smaller children go to sleep. With slightly older children you can put a clock in their room and teach them about going-to-bed and getting-up times. Some parents feel that night-lights disturb their children’s sleep whilst others feel it calmly helps their children drift off to sleep. Find what works best for you and your child.

Rules about privacy

Teach your child about privacy – but remember whilst they are simple rules you will have to follow them too. If it is a rule in your house that you knock on bedroom and bathroom doors and wait for an answer before you enter, children will get into the habit of doing it too.

You could always get a lock but fix it to the top of your door so smaller children don’t lock themselves in by accident. Don’t feel guilty about wanting some privacy. If there’s a problem you’ll soon know about it. It’s important that you give yourself and - if you have a partner -your relationship, some time and privacy.

How we can help you

If you would like support and advice, you can talk to one of our Family Support Workers by calling our confidential helpline on 0808 800 2222. You can also share experiences and advice with other parents on our Forums. Family Lives is here for you and you can contact us about any family issue, big or small.

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