-
Chat to other families
Waiting for exam results can be an anxious time for young people as they may feel that so much is at stake depending on their exam results.
Immediately after the hard work and pressure of exams, parents and young people may feel relieved and relaxed. This may soon give way to an even more stressful period - waiting for and dealing with exam results. This stage can be more uncomfortable than the exams themselves because parents and young people feel helpless. Before or during the exams they could at least do something but now they can only wait.
Children may get caught up in endless repetitions of regret and recrimination, going over what they did or failed to do and how they might have done it differently. Some young people might feel relieved and glad that it is finally over. However, your child reacts and responds, it is important to give them support and help distract them at this time. Don't walk around on eggshells. Instead, try to talk with your child about their feelings and the choices and options facing them.
Have a conversation with your son or daughter to find out what their expectations are, and give them the reassurance that whatever the results, you are proud of them and will be encouraging them in the future to achieve their goals.
If your child is applying for University, equip yourself with information about how to use the clearing system for UCAS (the admissions system for university) as there may be a lot of competition for places.
If your child is hoping to go to college or sixth form, make sure you know who to call and have numbers to hand in case the grades are not quite what you were expecting. It is still worth having a conversation to see if the grades are close enough to get onto the course or a similar one.
Your child may be interested in apprenticeships, in which case, find out as much information as you can so you can give them the best support.
If your child is feeling really anxious or stressed out waiting for the exam results, keep the conversation flowing as best you can. Maybe you can suggest relaxation techniques such as exercise or meditation to help them feel calmer. It may do them good to go out and see their friends and enjoy themselves. This will be a good distraction for them.
If the experience has been too stressful or their results were not what they hoped for, young people may feel like giving up as an immediate reaction. You may need to guide them firmly into going back to education and trying again. You do, however, have to keep a careful balance because young people sometimes have a better idea than their parents as to what is good for them. Don't push them unless it is clear it is towards something they want to do.
Plan or have an event to mark the results. Celebrate the effort that went into them and make it clear that you love, respect and value your child for who they are, independent of their achievements.
If you are worried you can pick up the phone and call us for advice and support via our helpline on 0808 800 2222. Your child can also speak to an adviser at The Mix which is a support service for young people.
This article was updated 3 August 2017
If you would like support and advice, you can talk to one of our Family Support Workers by calling our confidential helpline on 0808 800 2222. You can also share experiences and advice with other parents on our Forums. Family Lives is here for you and you can contact us about any family issue, big or small.