6min read
Anti bullying week 2024
This week marks the start of anti bullying week and we have lots of resources and helpful bullying advice to help you take a stand against bullying.
This week marks the start of anti bullying week and we have lots of resources and helpful bullying advice to help you take a stand against bullying.
6min read
Many children experience feelings of jealousy towards their new brother or sister, and may convey these feelings through resorting to more ‘babyish’ behaviour, such as having tantrums or refusing to use the potty even though they have been successfully potty-trained for a while. This is all perfectly natural, and is their way of expressing their feelings of frustration, and confusion about their role in your life and their place in the family.
It is completely normal for older siblings to react in this way to the arrival of a new baby, and should not in any way affect their future relationship, particularly if dealt with in an open and non-judgemental way by their parents, so that their feelings of jealousy will diminish over time. Even if your child appears to be independent and capable of doing many things for themselves and without your constant attention, they still need your love and interest just as much as before – maybe now more than ever. These types of behaviour are particularly prevalent in toddlers, who are still so used to having your undivided attention, and were not long ago being breast or bottle-fed by you or falling asleep in your lap.
Try not to punish your older child, as this may lead to them feeling more resentful towards the baby. Although you must explain clearly that they are not allowed to hurt the baby, tell them you know they are not meaning to be naughty and should tell you how they are feeling, rather than taking it out on their brother or sister. Hopefully this should encourage them to open up to you a bit more and feel comforted by the fact that you want to know how to help them feel better.
By responding with patience and understanding, your child will start to feel secure again, and know that by making room for a new member of the family, they are not giving up their place or getting any less love from you. This will help them to accept the baby and start to see that they are also a part of their life, in their role as big brother or sister.
If friends and family are buying gifts for the new baby, it may be an idea to get some gifts to give to your child too so they don't feel left out. You might also want to make up a little box full of treats and fun activities, books and toys from the baby to your child.
If you would like further support and advice, call our helpline on 0808 800 2222 or email us at askus@familylives.org.uk. You can talk to us online via our live chat service, which is open, Monday to Friday between 10.30am and 9pm. You may find it helps to find out how other parents and carers have coped with this on our online forums. We also have a range of free online parenting courses that can help through the ages and stages of parenting.
Visit the NCT website for ten top tips on managing sibling jealousy
Read this advice from Bounty on introducing a new baby to siblings
Do you have a new baby in the family? Why not access our free, online and innovative New Baby in the Family course? Based on our forty years’ experience working with parents and families, our course has four modules with helpful ideas and resources to help you feel a happier and confident parent.
Watch our video below on tips on getting the kids involved with the new arrival